Getting along with others, don't argue; explaining just means you've already lost! - Crypto Circle Interpretation

I recently came across two stories,

which resonated deeply.

One is a scene from the movie “Let the Bullets Fly.”

Liuzi went to the street to eat a bowl of cold noodles,

was about to pay and leave,

but was falsely accused by the owner of eating two bowls,

and only paid for one.

Faced with slander and ridicule,

Liuzi desperately clarified: "One is one,

two is two.

I only ate one bowl of cold noodles today!"

Others didn’t believe him,

no matter how Liuzi argued,

they remained indifferent.

To prove his innocence,

Liuzi, in a moment of impulsiveness,

cut open his own stomach with a knife.

The second story,

comes from the TV drama “Tian Dao.”

Ding Yuan Ying went to a breakfast stall and ordered a bowl of wontons,

when he finished and wanted to leave,

the owner stopped him,

saying he hadn’t paid.

He hesitated,

took out the money and paid again.

At this moment, another customer said,

“I saw him pay as soon as he arrived.”

The owner opened her mouth to respond,

but Ding Yuan Ying walked away without a word.

Similarly, when facing a shop owner’s false accusation,

Liuzi and Ding Yuan Ying chose very different approaches,

leading to completely different outcomes.

The former insisted on arguing about right and wrong,

blood was shed on the spot; the latter, lazy to argue,

admitted guilt, paid, and left calmly.

When others misunderstand you,

explanations are actually the most useless thing.

Those who believe in you need no explanation,

and those who don’t believe will find it useless no matter how much you explain.

In dealing with people,

if we always try to force explanations,

we have already lost.

01

Explaining to those who don’t understand you,

is a waste of words.

The Book of Songs says: "He who knows me,

says my heart is heavy; he who does not know me,

what does he seek?"

In life,

not everyone understands you,

when you encounter someone who doesn’t,

explanation only leads to misinterpretation.

Rather than wasting time defending yourself,

it’s better to smile and let it go.

Writer Li Shanglong once shared his experience.

Once, he was in the lounge reading a book titled “Hope Always Remains,”

when a colleague came in,

glanced at the title,

mockingly said, “You’re reading chicken soup too!”

What the colleague didn’t know was,

it’s a book about war veterans,

with bloody stories,

about the world’s transformation and Cambodia’s past.

Li Shanglong wanted to explain seriously,

but,

he suddenly held back,

smiling and saying: "Yeah,

chicken soup."

The colleague was satisfied with the answer and left.

Another time, while riding the subway,

Li Shanglong was engrossed in Mo Yan’s “Big Breasts and Wide Hips.”

A passerby looked at the title,

and shook his head disdainfully,

thinking Li Shanglong was reading smut in public.

Faced with such suspicion,

Li Shanglong didn’t argue on the spot,

but later expressed in his writing column:

"We are humans,

but not of the same kind."

Different circumstances,

others simply can’t understand you; different perspectives,

explanations can be seen as cover-ups.

Many times,

we feel exhausted because we expect everyone to understand.

When faced with a little doubt,

we want to explain ten or a hundred times.

Troubling others,

also suppresses ourselves.

As Haruki Murakami once said: "Things that can’t be understood without explanation,

won’t be understood even if explained."

The sweetness of wine,

only those who taste it know; the bitterness of medicine,

only those who drink it understand.

Similarly,

when people don’t understand you,

even if you exhaust your words,

others will still be hostile.

There’s no need to force everything,

no need to respond to right and wrong one by one.

We only need to maintain our own life course,

not live in others’ mouths,

time will naturally help us find the most suitable people.

02

Arguing with unreasonable people,

drains yourself.

“Stop Your Inner War” tells a story.

Two friends planned to go out for a walk and enjoy nature.

Halfway,

they encountered a hooligan,

whistling at them maliciously.

One of the girls was furious,

ready to scold him,

but was firmly held back by her friend.

Seeing no one responded,

the hooligan, feeling bored,

quickly left.

After the hooligan left,

the girl was puzzled,

questioning her friend: "That guy is just a damn hooligan,

why didn’t you let me give him a good lesson?"

Her friend comforted her,

the hooligan was unreasonable,

arguing with him would only bring trouble.

After this incident,

they returned to the hotel feeling unenthusiastic,

that night,

they saw a local news report:

a woman was followed by a man and got into a dispute,

the man killed her.

What made them shiver was,

the man was actually the hooligan who harassed them during the day.

They avoided conflict with the hooligan,

luckily escaped harm,

but another girl unfortunately lost her life.

Old saying: Better to fight with the wise,

than to argue with fools.

Arguing with unreasonable people,

besides exhausting yourself,

serves no purpose.

Writer Ha Shu once mentioned his friend Lao Chen.

Once Lao Chen went to eat,

and encountered some gangsters at the next table,

they drank heavily, sang and danced,

several times spilling wine on Lao Chen.

Lao Chen couldn’t stand it,

reminded them a few times to behave in public.

Eventually,

they argued,

and the other side, drunk, started a fight,

Lao Chen’s neck was cut by a glass bottle,

luckily no arteries were hurt,

and he survived.

When Ha Shu visited Lao Chen in hospital,

he said seriously: "You deserve it,

arguing with a bunch of scoundrels."

Lao Chen was also annoyed for provoking them,

now,

not only was he in hospital,

but his work bonus was also lost.

In life,

we will also encounter unreasonable people,

arguing with them,

often backfires.

Learning to stay away from them,

is the wisest choice.

After all, the cost of sacrifice between people varies,

don’t let your peaceful life

pay for trivial disputes.

As Teacher Zhao Yuping once mentioned in his “Happiness Let” theory:

Two sheep meet on a narrow bridge,

one is terminally ill,

the other just won the lottery.

In a standoff where neither yields,

who should make the first compromise? The obvious answer is the sheep who just won the lottery.

Because this sheep has more to gain,

and is happier,

if you argue over such small matters,

you’ll end up losing more than you gain.

Life is not a battlefield,

why get into a tense stand-off with unreasonable people,

just for a moment of satisfaction?

It’s better to broaden your mind,

less quarreling,

reduce internal friction over trivial matters,

and spend more time and energy

on people and things that truly matter.

03

Arguing with people of different levels,

lowers your IQ.

I once read a story.

A painter was sharing his artistic philosophy at an exhibition,

when,

a critic interrupted his speech,

criticizing that his works were all trash.

The painter ignored him,

continued explaining his art.

The critic interrupted again: “Why don’t you respond to me? Do you agree that everything I said is true?”

The painter smiled and replied: "Of course not.

You haven’t paid my tuition,

why should I tell you

what’s right?"

This remark

made the guests at the exhibition burst into laughter,

and also helped the painter gain fame.

Writer J.D. Salinger once said: "Don’t argue with a fool,

otherwise, people won’t know who the fool is."

When people are at different levels,

no matter how fierce the debate,

they can’t reach consensus.

I saw a British animated short called “The Antelope.”

At the beginning,

two antelopes were arguing by the river about what the floating object was.

Antelope A insisted it was a crocodile,

while Antelope B stubbornly believed it was a piece of wood.

To prove he was right,

Antelope A tried to hit it with a stone,

poke it with a stick,

but the floating object remained unmoved.

Now Antelope B was even more convinced it was a piece of wood.

Antelope A, unwilling to give up,

jumped onto the floating object to prove himself,

but ended up in the crocodile’s mouth.

This seemingly nonsensical scene,

is not uncommon in our lives.

There are always some people,

trapped by their own thinking,

when you reason with them,

they just cause trouble; when you present facts,

they turn a blind eye.

Arguing with such people,

besides exhausting yourself,

is pointless.

The gap in cognition,

so-called debate,

is really a tug-of-war of IQ.

The other party has never been to your place,

so they can’t understand your thoughts and feelings.

Instead of wasting time on useless arguments,

it’s better to take a step back,

give a little,

and focus more on living your own life.

Painter Chen Danqing once said:

"It’s unnecessary to let everyone know the real you,

or to keep explaining yourself,

because people only want to see what they hope to see."

The more we explain,

the easier we are to be blackened; the more we argue,

the more we get hurt.

Life is only a few decades long,

meeting like-minded people is already a coincidence; differing worldviews,

are the norm.

Many times,

it’s not that you’re not good enough,

but that those who don’t understand you have their own standards.

Try to give up pointless disputes,

pretend to be deaf and mute when appropriate.

Only then,

can we stay away from conflicts,

reduce disputes,

and spend our time and energy on our own lives.